reallyndacarter:

I was offered a role in Goncharov, but I am too busy on Tumblr to do it.

headless-horsepossum:

My uncle is autistic so he has sensory sensitivities, and he’s largely nonverbal so he can’t tell you what those sensitivities Are, so what he does is, if you give him a shirt that is a bad texture, he goes and gets his scissors and he cuts it into tiny little pieces so no one can ever ask him to wear it ever again, and the thing is is that he is so totally right

souperluminal:

Thinking about a duct tape wizard

ottitty:

Mens tits. You agree. Reblog.

mortalityplays:

vegans making honey a bee labour issue is the funniest thing imaginable because like, you picked the one animal that has already unionised

tiktaalic:

Did you know? On average, Tesla owners are involved in collisions 18% more frequently than any other car. Research has shown this is because when I see that stupid fucking logo i floor it.

engulfes:

Growing up is actually all about realizing people don’t inherently dislike you and it’s a bit odd to assume they do

extravapalooza:

this piece poses a controversial, raw, often ignored question of our times: what if two transsexuals smoked a blunt

ezorzea:

sorry I’ve been posting like shit lately I got picked up by a large bird and have only been able to get on tumblr when we fly near a cell tower. oh great it’s heading back towards the mountai

prinnay:

Stickers and new stuff! o:

boyboobs:

high as hell and im thinking about ehat if there was a meme going around that was just posting this picture under people’s posts

captioned “i drinked you” and people would freak out and all the tags would be like “GET DRINKED” “IDIOT GOT DRINKED” tha k you for coming to my teddy talky

dwarfmun:

Hey I have good news for everyone.

Cringe culture literally does not exist outside of the internet.

I take my Minecraft backpack to college and I get tons of compliments on it. My boss’s son plays Minecraft and he’s elated to have a “resident Minecraft expert.”

Lots of things that fall under “cringe” are very dear to me and my friends. Good people recognize and celebrate that passion, no matter what it’s for.

funnytwittertweets:

barkonthedancefloor:

I’m still homeless.

Living in my car on the side of the road.

I have been here since being evicted 2020 from losing our job due to covid.

I am getting fucking tired of surviving while you get houses, sacrificing for your passive income, I should burn your fucking shit to the ground, landlords do not deserve my time my fucking blood, you deserve to be drug out and forced to bite the curb you fucking leech.

huffylemon: